Tuesday, July 03, 2007

The Sad, Sad Story of a Chicken

Mom cooked an entire real live dead chicken yesterday. She mutilated it. She cut the back out, then took out what she called the keelbone and spread it flat on a big pan. She surrounded it with cut up potatoes, carrots and onions, then sprinkled everything with dirt and sand. It was appalling. Then she stuck it in the hot-as-hell box. After it had been in there for a while, she took it out and spread some brown goop all over the chicken, and returned it back to the hot-as-hell box.

I have to admit it started to smell really good.

The next thing I know, Mom's sister and her husband (who is a Big guy, so I am going to call him Mr Big) and Mr Karate were all here. Mom put all the food on a great big platter and put it in the middle of the table. I waited until everybody was busy, then jumped up on the table to get some for myself.

The platter was completely EMPTY!

I was told to GET DOWN!

I didn't get any chicken.

I am bereft.

Does it show?

19 comments:

  1. Anonymous8:37 AM

    Oh Millie I feel your pain. It's not nice dat the beans cook something as delicious as chicken and not give some to you. You just need to start begging and bugging yore mom.

    Your furrend,
    Bounce

    ReplyDelete
  2. We can't believe they didn't share any of the chicken with you!! You do look so sad!! We hope your Mom gives you lots of extra treats for after not sharing with you.
    Your FL furiends,
    Samantha & Tigger

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous8:57 AM

    Dear Millie
    It is not my fault your mother did not cook enough chicken. I could have told her there wasn't enough, but does she listen to me! Oh no! I am just the younger sister.
    :)
    Mom's sister

    ReplyDelete
  4. Dear Mrs Mr Big (aka Mom's sister):

    Mom didn't expect Mr Big and Mr Karate. And she only had one chicken.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Buh..buh...MILLIEBELLY!!!!

    MomBean: For pete's sake, go sit in the icebox!

    ReplyDelete
  6. I feel your pain! I never get good people food either. Mine mombean mostly eats vegi-tarian, and who wants tofu?
    You should go on strike till she gives you some good stuff.
    ---Beezer
    PeeEss. I'm glad that you and your mombean liked my review of your art! :)

    ReplyDelete
  7. Poor baby, no chik-hen...dat is just tortcher and is punishabul...wate, yoo got on top of da table wif all doze beans der! Omigosh, are yoo getting *gulp* frendly?

    ReplyDelete
  8. no chick-hen? that's just....just...oooooooooo!!! that's just so wrong!

    ReplyDelete
  9. The chickens here already come mutilated. Momma buys them that way cuz she is lazy. Sumetimes she is so lazy she goes all the way to Kentucky to get chicken already fried.

    Does bereft mean cute? If it does, you look bereft.

    Patches

    ReplyDelete
  10. Oh Millie, I'm sorry you didn't get any chicken. :( You look very cute in your photo and your tummy is lovely!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Well... at least your mom eats chicken and not just fake chicken.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Oh, poor Millie! Not even one tiny chicken morsel? That is very sad.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Oh no! That's furry furry sad Millie, and you look greef-strik-hen over your loss! It's no fe-air fur da hoomans to make something as yummy as chik-hen and then not share! The only thing worse would be not sharing TOOONA!
    We hopes your Mom makes it up to you soon!
    T.F.S.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Poor Millie! I can't believe they didn't leave you any chicken. I say bite an ankle in protest.

    Chase

    ReplyDelete
  15. You didn't get ANY?!? None? Oh, that's horrible. You need to remind your momma that tidbits from the table make for much more friendly kitty behavior. You an' Jasmine need to be whisker sharks and get you some CHICKEN! I suggest buggin' Mr. Karate for bites by headbuttin' him.
    DMM

    ReplyDelete
  16. Isn't this the second time you didn't get any chicken???? Millie, what's up? You oughta' be beyond bereft - outrage girl, outrage!

    ReplyDelete
  17. They didn't even save you some, not even a tiny bite? How aweful are the beans to do that. It must have been really tasty if they ate it all.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Totally not fair you missed out on the chicken. And yes, we all can tell how saddened you are by missing the deliciousness of the forbidden chicken.

    ReplyDelete